Tag: angielski - strona 5

Kolejny angielski humor

M................a • 2013-04-12, 11:03

250

<%wgluv2hunt> I was in a bar Saturday night, and had a few drinks.
<%wgluv2hunt> I noticed two large women by the bar. They both had strong accents so I asked, "Hey, are you two ladies from Ireland?"
<%wgluv2hunt> One of them screamed, "It's Wales you idiot!"
<%wgluv2hunt> So, I immediately apologized and said, "Sorry, are you two whales from Ireland?"
<%wgluv2hunt> That's all I remember.

(Tak, zerżnięte z basha).

Angielski kawal o ciapatych

fantasticplayer • 2013-02-27, 10:32

83

Dzis w robocie na szlugu gadalem se z angolem o ciapatych i ten opowiedzial mi kawal. Wymagany podstawowy agnielski.

My friend Mike went to prison. After entering the cell, he saw a prisoner who asked:
Prisoner: what r u in for?
Mike: aa (aggravated assault)
Prisoner: and how much u got?
Mike: 2 years, but what r u in for?
Prisoner: PPoP
Mike: What the fuck is that?
Prisoner: Putting petrol on pakis
Mike: Wow, and how much u got?
Prisoner: About four per gallon

PS: Po angielsku brzmi lepiej.

Mały Jimmy

r................z • 2013-02-16, 12:41

196

Dowcip w formie pisemnej nic do życia nie wniesie. Koniecznie musi być powiedziany na głos.

Wymagana średnia znajomość angielskiego

Little Jimmy was 10 years old. He was a little bit slow in the head (may even say - retarded). Once upon the time he went to an Ice Cream shop to buy a chocolate ice cream. He comes to the shopkeeper and says (with his little bit retarded voice):
Jimmy: Hello, do you have a... chocolate ice cream?
Shopkeeper: Well hello Jimmy. Sorry, we don't have chocolate flavor, pick a different one.
J: Ok... so... can I have a chocolate ice cream?
S: Look Jimmy... sigh... we don't have chocolate flavor. Pick something else.
J: Oh... so... a chocolate ice cream?
S: Jimmy. Could you spell "blue" - like in "blueberry"?
J: Yeah. It's B-L-U-E. Blue.
S: Great! Now could you spell "straw" - like in "strawberry"?
J: S-T-R-A-W. Straw.
S: Well done. Now, could you spell "fuck" - like in "chocolate"?
J: F-U... Wait! There's no "fuck" in "chocolate"!
S: Exactly!

Nie odpowiadam za to, że ktoś jest r-tardem i nie rozumie gry słów.

Szybki angielski #2

mikEWrona • 2013-01-16, 4:56

218

I was gonna tell you a joke about a vagina but you will never get it.

Język Angielski

M................3 • 2012-12-19, 13:56

211

Język angielski – myślisz, że go znasz dopóki Szkot nie zapyta o drogę.

Kawał liczbowy

Darson666 • 2012-12-08, 19:26

258

Do you know why 6 is affraid of 7?
Because 7 8 9.

W wolnym tłumaczeniu, gimbusy, to jest: czemu 6 boi się 7? Bo 7 8 9/ bo 7 zjadło 9 (ate=zjadł czyta się jak eight). Dziękuję.

hipster i kawa

sabor • 2012-11-26, 20:49

207

How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank his coffee before it was cool.

Szkoła angielskiego

S................i • 2012-11-19, 16:06

211

Szkoła angielskiego.

Języki obce

M................3 • 2012-11-08, 14:54

305

- Ile zna pan języków?
- Trzy
- Jakie?
- Rosyjski, angielski, francuski.
- Proszę powiedzieć coś po angielsku.
- Gutten tag.
- Ale to jest po niemiecku.
- To znam cztery…

W zoologicznym

karolcba • 2012-10-09, 12:10

108

Sklep zoologiczny.
Wchodzi facio:
- Masz Pan przypadkiem papugę, co zna angielski?
- Nie mam, niestety. Ale mam dzięcioła co zna alfabet Morse'a...

#angielski